Skip to main content

Thank God you can pick your friends!

My husband and I are about to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of very special friends. We met Ted and Deanna 36 years ago and we've stayed strongly connected through a number of moves (ours not theirs), illnesses, life's many ups and downs. We've shared sad times and joyous times. We've traveled together, spent wonderful visits at each others' homes. I'm sure we must have shared thousands of meals together. Thousands of laughs. They've always, ALWAYS been there for us and we have always tried to be there for them. History. We have a deep and meaningful shared history.

J. and I are  truly blessed to have a wonderful group of close friends and we value them all. But there are very few couples I've known and loved longer than this very special couple. You can't pick your blood relatives but thank God you can pick your friends. From the very first time we all met, J and I picked them. We were couples with young families. We were in the first decade of our careers. It seems like such a long time ago and yet it feels like yesterday.

Wasn't it yesterday when J. came home after first meeting Ted and Deanna and couldn't stop telling me how warm, welcoming, and caring they were?

Wasn't it yesterday when I was very pregnant with my daughter and left my two year old son with their twelve year old daughter and her friend, Deanna assuring me they would be very responsible babysitters? And of course they were.

Wasn't it yesterday when we celebrated their wonderful daughter's Bat Mitzvah?

Wasn't it yesterday when my 2 year old daughter, asleep under a restaurant table smelled chocolate fondue and climbed onto the table where Ted happily gave her her very first taste of chocolate?

Wasn't it yesterday when Deanna and I bought matching pairs of NYT crossword puzzle pajamas and both put them on for one of our many sleepovers?

And I certainly remember so many yesterdays when either J. or I were sick and worried we had some "deadly" disease when Ted (our forever doctor as well as our forever friend) was there for us, calmed us, took unbelievable care of us, made us feel that we were always in the best of hands. And of course we were. That's why he's now the physician to so many of my friends. I don't want those I love to see anyone else!

And how many yesterdays did I confide in Deanna and seek her wisdom and knowledge about myself, my children, my grand-children, even my friends, their children and on and on? Always, she listened and advised. Such sound, helpful advice. Such loving advice. 

Loving. Yes, that's it in a nutshell. They are loving. Loving to each other, to their family, to their friends. J. and I are so very blessed to be able to count ourselves as two of them.

I can't say enough about the value of having true friends. I guess that's what having such good friends is all about. There's never enough to say...and there's no way to say it all.

Happy 50th our dear, dear friends!  Yet another joyful event we get to celebrate together.


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Let's get rid of the "pipe" in pipe dreams!

I have had dreams of doing any number of things all my life. Either I or others were quick to label them "pipe" dreams. "Pipe" as in foolish, impractical, ridiculous? A lot of people my age have come to realize that dreams are not the stuff of foolishness. The other day I got an email from a neighbor/friend from my old town who'd discovered my blog. She told me she had started a new "cottage" business of selling greeting cards with her amazing photos on them. Here's her site because you all really should check out these very original cards - It was a reminder to me that no matter our age, young, middle, older, oldest, we have the opportunity to dream new dreams, or capture old dreams and actualize them. We can stop identifying them as "pipe" dreams. I think many of us have spent a good portion of our adult lives  on being practical, cautious, and maybe feeling a little scared or a lot scared. Many of us stifled our cre

You can take the girl out of The Bronx, but...

Well, you know the rest. I have to confess for a long time I really tried to get rid of The Bronx. For a long time after that I thought I had. And for a long time I felt good about it. I'd escaped. No one could tell by my speech, my look, my style, etc. I used to love to hear, "You're from The Bronx? I'd never have guessed." And it's more than that. It's escaping a past that didn't fit in with my fantasy of who I wanted to become, who I wanted to be. It was an escape from a certain social class, an escape from parents whose customs, manners, interests felt alien to me - or maybe the truth was I wanted them to feel alien to me. I wanted to be my own creation!  But deep down I knew the truth. I knew it and it bothered me. I felt like there was really no escape. Not from The Bronx. Not from the lower income class that shaped me. Not from a mother who loved a bargain more than almost anything. And it bothered me. But lately something has changed. It&